Chapter One: Change your Story - Change Your Reality
Each one of us has a story that we tell ourselves regarding areas in our lives such as love, money, success, luck, health, illness and the list goes on.
Where do we begin to create these stories and are they serving us in the most positive way possible?
Throughout my career as a teacher, psychotherapist, writer and speaker, I have heard many people's stories regarding their lives. They sound something like this:
"Nothing ever works out. That's the story of my life!"
“I have the worst luck!
“I get sick every long weekend.”
“I’m overweight, but it's genetic. My grandmother and my mother were overweight.”
“I never make enough money.”
“I never meet anyone worthy of dating.”
“People don’t have sex once they’re married! Why should our marriage be any different?"
“I’m not very motivated. I can’t help it. I was born that way!”
What story have you written for your life? What type of chapters make up your story?
Perhaps some of the chapters in your life have had happy endings; while others have been unhappy. Have you asked yourself why some areas of your life fall into place just the way you imagine and other areas seem to unravel leaving you stuck or constantly running into obstacles?
Since the time we are born, we are told stories about who we are, of what we are capable, including judgements and limitations others put upon us; and these numerous tales that, consciously or unconsciously we retell ourselves over and over unfortunately become the stories of our lives.
For example, if we as children tend to trip and fall or have several accidents; someone might say that we are clumsy or accident prone. Over time, we begin to believe this story about ourselves and inevitably we become just that: an accident prone adult. The best case scenario, we might become clumsy and knock things over a lot and typically respond like this: "Sorry! I'm such a clumsy person. I can't help it. I've been like that all of my life!" Worst case scenario, we continue to have more and more accidents until one day we have a serious car accident and harm ourselves or others.
If we convince ourselves that these labels are true, we will either create or manifest the very situations in our lives that validate our belief in what we've been told. Consequently, we will then respond with something like this: “See, I told you I was accident prone. I had that accident and totaled my car! I’ve been like this all of my life!”
The problem and the solution to this type of thinking is rooted in the same location: Our brain and more specifically our neuro-pathways, which first take in repeated messages – positive or negative - and then begin to create paths that become ingrained within our subconscious mind about who we are, what we do and of what we are capable. Over time, like any path that is trodden upon it becomes worn and rarely can anything new take root and grow. The good news is that numerous scientific studies have shown that our minds are capable of being re-programmed – which eventually result in the old, limiting pathways fading away or growing over into new, more positive ones.
Think of a path in a forest. If we walk over it every day for years and years, there will be no growth left – only muck and mire and a worn path. However, if we were to begin travelling in a new direction, the path that was once completely worn would naturally begin to sprout new life and become overgrown; and not only would we not recognize it anymore, we would not feel at all inclined to travel down it either.
What does this mean? This means that every negative story we have been told and have continued to tell ourselves about ourselves and our lives can be transformed. Hence, our thoughts, words and ultimately our actions can create much more positive outcomes within our lives and help us to feel much more positive about ourselves and others.
We need only to align ourselves with positive thoughts, words and actions and turn away from the negative, fearful thoughts that others planted in our spirits when we were children. As adults, we can write, re-write and continue to revise the stories of our lives to be whatever we want. Isn’t this wonderful news?
How do you begin to change the story of your life? The answer is simple: Change begins with you and your subconscious mind and with three very simple steps:
In this book, I will explore the idea that is sweeping the world regarding The Secret by Rhonda Byrnes and how, while it is absolutely true that each and everyone one of us can manifest everything we desire, there are steps that we need to take before we can put our desires out to the Universe and receive them.
This is not because the Universe requires some special formula from you – it is simply because according to the Law of Attraction, you attract things in accordance to the vibrational energy you express out into the world. This is why it is so important that what you believe, think, say and do be in accordance with what you desire. If the stories you have been telling yourself all of your life are not in alignment with what it is you desire, you will remain stuck or run into obstacle after obstacle, leaving you frustrated and convinced that that is the story of your life!
For example, if you have a poverty consciousness, but are affirming that you want to be rich; the Universe is receiving mixed messages. Therefore, the positive affirmations you are repeatedly saying are being negated by your negative beliefs. What you create in your life is directly dependent on the programming of your subconscious mind and therefore your thoughts, words, actions and vibrational energy need to be in alignment with what you desire. This book will help you re-program your subconscious beliefs and facilitate the process of aligning you with the things and the life which you desire.
Otherwise, you will continue to attract the things that you have been attracting – based on old and usually, limited programming from your childhood - and let’s face it, if you were completely happy with these outcomes, you would not be reading this book and the entire world would be in a completely different state of being. We will get there, but first, it takes some knowledge, skills and required application.
Varasi described David as “certainly a miracle that of Michelangelo, to restore to life one who was dead.”
David is the quintessential piece of art that truly represents the essence – the story if you will - of the Renaissance period. The word Renaissance actually means to be reborn. It is a cultural movement that spanned the period roughly from the 14th to the 17th century, beginning in Italy in the late Middle Ages and later spreading to the rest of Europe.
The famous artist, sculptor and inventor, Michelangelo believed that within each block of marble was an art form already contained. Before beginning any sculpture, he studied the block of marble for days. He rose very early so that he could go outside and look at the block in the first rays of sunlight.
He believed that light would reveal the most about the block of marble. He would be able to see the direction of the grade, the flaws, the air bubbles, and the natural inclination of the rock. He then perceived his job as the sculptor to gently carve away all superfluous material so that the art – the story of its essence - could reveal itself.
This is what is required to be reborn – not to hammer away at a rock (ourselves) to force it into a form - but to gently remove the blockages so that the art or genius within can reveal itself. Essentially, as we carve away the negative beliefs (the old stories) that no longer serve us, our authentic selves (our true stories) are revealed out of this stone in which we have surrounded ourselves.
This book is intended to help you accomplish this – to release all of the negative beliefs and stories that may be obstacles to you having all that you desire in your life. We need to begin our journey of manifesting what we desire, by beginning to allow our perspective in life to be continually reborn and hopefully, like a pebble in the water, whose ripples spread out and affect the multitude of molecules of hydrogen and oxygen around it – sharing our knowledge and experiences will inspire and help others to have a Renaissance of their own.
The beginning of my Renaissance Period began approximately ten years ago when I began reading a book, entitled, You Can Heal Your Life by Louise L. Hay. Her basic premise was and still is, if we begin to change our thoughts and our words from destructive or negative to creative, positive ones, we will begin to see changes in ourselves and eventually in our lives. We will begin to manifest the things we want, instead of continuing to create more of what we don’t want. I am here to tell you I have seen living proof of this power in my own life over the last ten years.
I have been able to find employment as a teacher when all economic statistics were seemingly against me; to be told there was no job for me in the fall, only to be told one hour later – after prayer and meditation – that there was indeed a job for me; to travel and live in Colombia, South America for three years; to write and publish two novels; to travel around the world; and to attract many friends and wonderful experiences to my life.
However, there are times in our lives that we can become stuck or even go backwards on our journey of spiritual growth and cannot seem to extricate ourselves very well or very quickly. This has happened a few times along my journey, even though I might be convinced that I am thinking, saying and acting in accordance with my innermost desires. However, what often happens is that even though we are writing or speaking many positive affirmations throughout the day, we also often ruminate about our problems or have a subconscious story we tell ourselves. Rather than our affirmations creating the solution, we inadvertently are negating the very things we desire and continue to attract more frustrating circumstances.
I have come to the conclusion that when I find myself stuck or not able to manifest the things in which I desire, it is because I am focused on what I don’t want, or in other words, the canyon I have to cross and all of the obstacles and fears of crossing it. Once I shift my focus to what it is I do want and I begin to rewrite the negative story that I have been telling myself for years and create a positive revision - is when I begin to see the change or transformation I am seeking in my life and I easily move across the canyon and continue on my journey.